Feigned Sleep

Kaoru lolled in and out of sleep, half in his dreams. He jolted up feeling Hikaru’s arm on his side, brushing the exposed skin that his shirt had left uncovered on his stomach. He glanced around the room, unable to remember the dream that had pierced his thoughts not a moment ago.

Realizing he had thrown the covers off of himself, he gently pulled them back. Hikaru mumbled something and wrapped his arms around his brother’s waist; Kaoru loved him half asleep, almost as much as awake.

Then, without any warning, Hikaru nuzzled his face into the back of Kaoru’s neck. Kaoru smiled at the breath rolling down his neck, in addition to the comforting groan. Hikaru could be so innocent sometimes; it was almost unfair.

Pushing back against the nuzzling boy, Kaoru tried to sleep.

Though only moments later he could feel Hikaru shift – and then nip at his ear. Kaoru’s eyes flew open, but he shut them quickly as to feign sleep.

Hikaru got up on his knees to stare down at his counterpart. All Kaoru could hear was his soft breathing, and he felt the bed move under the shifting weight. Hikaru was laying over him, one arm by Kaoru’s back, and the other limbs by his legs.

What was Hikaru doing? Kaoru felt the answer very quickly.

Their lips touched, and without a single movement Kaoru could feel the heat pulsing off of his lips; seemingly absorbed by his brother’s.

Would his brother feel his trembling and find out he was awake? How could he be so calm, when his body is pushed against his brother’s?

Kaoru’s heartbeat was speeding up, and he was sure his brother would catch him awake.

Hikaru pulled away and sat on his knees. His hand slid over his brother’s tense body. It hit Kaoru too late that he had taken a sharp intake of breath, until his twin paused, presumably to check if he was still asleep.

After what seemed like a confirmation that his twin was fast asleep, Hikaru turned away and was silent.

After a few agonizing minutes, he turned back.

“I love you, Kaoru. I think now is a good time to tell you.”

Why don’t you say this when I am standing next to you‘awake’? Kaoru pleaded.

They had said ‘I love you’ many times to each other, but somehow this seemed different. The way Hikaru implicated the words and said them softly.

“Please understand.” He paused, looked at Kaoru and crawled back into bed next to him. He cuddled his younger brother and wrapped his arm back around him.

Hikaru settled, and then whispered, “I don’t regret what I said. But I am sorry for keeping you up.”

Kaoru’s eyes shot open for a second time that night, and then he turned to face his brother.

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